Christmas Eve, 2009

Well, we've done it again.  We have, entirely on our own accord, circled the sun again and arrived at the same place we started.   (I apologize in advance, I have given up the pretense of being able to chat and just talk about the stuff here w/o analyzing it into pieces.  it is not in my nature....I need help, but until it arrives, it is what it is).   The two sojourners from Iowa have returned, Gary and Caroline have gone home for Christmas, and Nancy and I are holding down the fort, reading about the snow covered US, with cancelled flights, homes w/o power in the cold, and wondering exactly why anyone ever wanted to go home in the first place.  OH, that's right, family and such.   Yes, I do miss my son's every day.  I have taken to calling them semi regularly to keep in touch, it is so much better than just e mailing.  Yesterday and last night were cloudy, rainy and cold (by Haitian standards).   It likely got in to the upper 60's last night, and I am sure the Haitians, especially those up in the hills, wore every stitch of clothes they had to sleep in last night.   the sun is up today, clouds have cleared, and it is expected to be upper 90's tomorrow.   helps for the shower, once you have adjusted to the weather taking a really cold shower is no fun.  Nancy is making a cake to take down to the orphanage as a surprise for the kids there.  We will hit the store later today to get whatever for the next day, as stores do close for Christmas here. 

Back to the endless loop we are in; it seems again that I arrive at the same point with maybe not the same, but similar questions.  I fixed this, but where did that come from?  It amazes me that there seems to be no end to the living of life.   Knit one, curl two, or whatever that thing is.   Like one step forward, two backwards, 4 forwards, 3 backwards and you are right where you started.   I think I am begininng to understand Paul when he said he had learned to be fine with lot's or not much.  The days pass anyway so why worry?   God put's who He will in our path's and I try to deal with that as best I can.  The rest isn't really that important if you really think about it.  Or at least IMHO.   So some kids from school have moved on the the states this year, one has been kicked out due to persistent misconduct, another has had to leave for safety reasons.   The circumstances of life just aren't really in our control, and it begins to become background noise to me.   Maybe that is just me being cynical, if so, please don't inform me of this, as I am perfectly happy to go along with my suppositions just the way they are.  I do what I can with what God gives me, affect people the best I can, and try to leave the rest alone.   I have glimpsed a part of what people can do (and I confess I am a people, too) when they get to far along in truly believing they know much about anything.   But I guess being aware of it helps me understand the truth of really not knowing much of anything, so again I find myself happy either way the wind blows. 

I hope this trip around the solar system has been better for everyone, though I know it hasn't for many, for far too many.  Nancy and I watched a YouTube video last night of John Lennon's song "The war is over" showing what is the truth for far too many people in the world.  That this Christmas is not a time of peace and love, but of desperation and lack.  I know I have so much to be truly, truly grateful for.  I hope I have a chance to share a little more, and in some small way, make some difference in someone's life this year.  Maybe this is one of real gifts of Christmas...knowing what our blessings are, and having the chance to share what we have somehow.   Right after understanding my sin, and my need for Jesus' redemption of my life, and then meeting those neighbors in my life that I can help, and be helped by.  Not that hard, really.   Hopefully.  

A Merry Christmas to all, those who have and have not, as much as is possible. 

Dieu benis ou, tout tan.

Dan Joshu. 

Monday, December 14, 2009

Ronid. 



can't get a picture of her to load now.  some of you know of her from last year.   Ronid has been forced to leave school, and the city of St. Marc, for her own safety.   Her mother has been accused of murdering a neighbor's baby, and the family has sworn vengeance.   For her safety, her father in law, Antonio, has taken Ronid and her two step brothers to the village out in the provice for protection.   As these things go, often times it is not as bad as it first appears, and I pray it is not this time, but the more we find out, it seems like it get's worse.   Her mother and father in law, have both apparently admitted to the judge that they are in voodoo, and that has fueled the desire for revenge from the dead baby's family.   Antonio has been released from his employment at the school, as we don't need people coming to school for their vengeance.  He has been given severance pay, and is, as stated, going to the village for safety.  There is a very real chance that Ronid may not return to school for the rest of the year, if at all.   If Antonio can't find a job, then they will live by subsistence farming in the village, and with no school there, there is a real chance she may never attend school again.   Life here is so fragile, one bad turn and whatever good you have built up vanishes and you are back to square one.   It is a real struggle for families to attain any sort of reasonable living standard, and things like this, with the associated legal costs (judges here accept bribes from both sides to decide the outcome of cases, so if you don't pay, you family member can be sent to prison for a long time.   Or, in a Haitian prison, a short time)  it is easy to fall back into a hole you can't climb out of.   It is hard to see how God works at these times, but my faith tells me He does work, and all I can do is trust Him.   I will pray for Ronid and her family, that all will come to know Jesus, and for their safety.   I hope you can also.  

Dieu benis ou

Dan Joshu

Sunday, December 13, 2009

No, I'm not dead.   Just some circumstances have made blogging less than attractive.  I went thru about a week of being very sick, not sure what it was.   I was told by someone who has had malaria 7 times it sure sounded like malaria, so I started on chloroquine.   Then it seemed to be something diferent so I went on cipro for about a week.  anyway, I couldn't eat for about a week, lost a lot of weight (again), and am just now feeling about back to par.   Also, our internet service has been very spotty,  apparently the service in the states moved from somewhere else to Virginia, so the bad weather there this month has made it more difficult to connect with their upload service.   And, I have been reading Philip Yancy's book, "What's so Amazing about Grace?".    After reading Brennan Mannings book, "The Ragamuffin Gospel", and now reading this, it seems that the whole concept of grace has taken on a new meaning in my life, it has a depth in me that never existed before, and I am grateful for that. 

As those that know me can attest, I can be a pain in the rear end at times.  I had gone thru the period of time which now appears typical of "Christian" development, where I knew everything, knew how everyone else should be, and knew they didn't know what I knew.   If only the world could have been like me.....what a place it would have been!       (ok, even I'm scared by that!).       But as I have read of grace, over and over again in Mannings book, and now Yancy's, I seem to recall that when I first came to God, grace was a natural thing.   I understood more then of my true nature than I did later.   It seems that when Jesus said we needed to be as children, He knew whereof He spoke.   As a child Christian, I had no presuppositions of the makings of my faith, and I accepted it as a gift.    As I matured (?)  I became more sure that I knew things I really didn't know, and sure that everyone not like me, well, just didn't get it!   

I remember standing in my new house, I had just bought from my pastor Steve, right next door to his house in the beautiful 'burb of Madison.    We were discussing worship and things, and I remember Steve telling me about grace.   Wonderful thing this grace, but obviously he didn't really get it, I thought.   We've got to whip these people into shape, march in order, just listen to me..........       Grace is fine, but by gosh, these people need some discipline.      Oy ve.......      

Over the next few years, I became a deacon in the church  (sorry to everyone who was deaconated by me!)
I was involved in pretty much everything as I knew I could work my way.....somewhere.    You see, as an ex Catholic, I knew that what I really needed was some of those nun's beating me again like in school.   (As an aside, I have more respect for the Catholic faith now than I have in years,  I guess grace is like that).   I became active in youth ministry.    Rufus, you need to repent on that decision!    :)       and I came to Haiti on a short term mission trip.     It seems God was not going to let go of this idiot.    Haiti got into my blood and it seemed that I had found a place to serve, and I truly know that coming to Haiti was God's will for me.   But curiously, I know more than ever, it was not for me to change others, but to be changed.    I have lived in a way most Americans wouldn't.   (really it isn't that bad here in this misison, there are others far more primitive).   I lost the "perks" of American society, the constant distractions and toys to play with.   I found myself, after all those years of living alone, living with people in a close situation that has stretched me.    And so, in this, thru reading and turning to God, I found grace.   That amazing thing I was so unwilling to give to others once I truly "knew" what it was to be Christian, has become so real to me, or at least is starting to.  

(Tony, short term missionary, working with Christelle.  She has failed 7th grade 2x in states, was sent to Haiti.  Now she is passing tests, and knows she is not a "dummy", but someone who can learn. )

There are so many opportunities to give grace, and so many more to need grace.   I think Yancy is right when he says it is the defining aspect of Christianity, of following Jesus, is giving grace and forgiveness when none is deserved.   The stories of people whose lives had been destroyed, at least in the "worldly" aspect, who found the ability to forgive and live in grace, are truly amazing, and the things that truly make Jesus alive for me more than anything.   I think God has been speaking to me, and finally, maybe, I've listened a little.   You know all the "peace and joy, blah, blah, blah......." we routinely spout as "Christians"?     Well, it seems a lot more real to me now.   Even when it seems things are not going how I would want, I have a reserve to fall back on, a place to go where I can know it really is all ok, and not because the circumstances will change.    It is ok because Jesus loves me, and I truly understand this, or am begininng to, for the first time.  I know I told some of you I would not be so spiritual this year, so please forgive me.   It seems that this is where I live here, and actually, I kind of like it.     It seems I am more free than I have ever been, and I like it.  Why, I even tasted a Haitian beer here recently, and, who knew, hellfire and brimstone didn't fall out of the sky!!!        so, life goes on in Haiti, school moves on to Christmas break, and while life isn't perfect, it seems more stable, the circumstances don't rock the boat the way it used to.   Why, Madison even seems like a place to be thankful for now!       How's that for grace?      :)

(kids practicing for Christmas play)

Dieu benis ou,

Dan

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Ok, I just realized that I lost a bunch of pictures.....so, text only.  blogging has become kind of tedious here for me, just being honest.  I find that this has kind of become my life for now, and it's hard to think of it in a sense that needs sharing that much.   I know there are things happening with school and the kids and such, but things here just kind of roll one into another and it all kind of starts to seem natural.   Like Wednesday, one of our workers had her son kidnapped for a few hours.   It happens here, especially around the end of the year and Christmas and the season.  Part of it is a voodoo thing, yes occasionally it happens that especially kids are kidnapped and killed, sacrificed.  No other way to say it.  This appears to be a run of the mill, maybe we'll get some money thing.   Thomas was kidnapped along with 5 other boys and held in a room for several hours before being released.  the other boys were afraid and crying.  Thomas prayed and sang the whole time.  It appears this eventually irritated the kidnappers enough that he let everyone go.  Thomas returned home and Friday we found out about it, had a meeting with the kids and talked to everyone about it and what to do.  I know this sounds crazy, life is boring but, oh, by the way, a boy was kidnapped.   It just becomes part of life and you go from day to day. 

Yesterday, they actually began to work on the road down the hill from us.    Dumped about 3 loads of rock and started grading the road, which is really bad.   Wonderful, but when they do this, the road is completely blocked, so you have to find another way out, which in the other direction can be hard to do, as the road is often blocked by trucks and stuff just parked in the road.  but we got thru, got the kids home....except for one little girl, Nikka.   she was supposed to go with some other kids who lived on the road blocked by us and walk home.  but she was in the back of the truck and no one notices until we were across town. so after I made my last drop, Nikka and I drove back to the school where her Mom was waiting to get here.   She was happy to see her Mom, as she is about 3 and not too sure about the big bald guy driving yet.   :)

Thanksgiving was nice, turkey and everything, believe it or not.   Gary and Caroline got a turkey from Agape ministries and we had a nice meal.   The other part of the day was spent working on the truck, as the wheel bearings were shot on the front driver side.   completely rusted out, so Al came over, he and Gary worked on it, and I went and got stuff and got dirty under the truck when that was needed.   Us gophers know where we belong...in the dirt!

School is evolving, I guess.  We find more ways the kids cheat by sharing books and tests.  It is frustrating, but we can only do so much with the staff and resources we have.  It is impossible to tell kids that cheating does them no good, it sure wouldn't have changed me when I was a kid.  We do what we can and I can tell it is having an effect.  We have made it a lot harder for them to cheat and scores are dropping on tests, so they are having to retake them and grumbling is becoming more evident, but they will get used to it. 

I am coming more to an understanding of the culture here that I will never be a part of.   I have heard others talk of time in other cultures, and no matter how long you spend, especially when it is racially different, you just can't "enter in" to the local culture as an outsider.   I hope that in the school we can impact the kids lives, bring them closer to Jesus or just get them to know Him, and give them some chance with a better education.  This is long term mission work and discipleship, and it is hard.  Whenever you hear of people having crusades and saving thousands at a time every night in a foreign land, doubt it.   Honestly, it really doesnt' work that way.  Everyone around will raise their hands to get saved every night usually, because they want the Bible, or tract or whatever is given out.   Then the next day you see people in the market selling Bibles, tracts, etc., by the box fulls.   Real change is hard, and slow and long term.  A culture that rejects God, or just dances around spirituality to get what they want (and I include most of America in that)  is changed little by little, person by person, unless the Holy Spirit falls over a whole town.  As I have said before, victories here are person by person.   Slow, but well worth it. 

I hope everyone is well, hope you are avoiding snow, (it is 7:30 am and it is 90 here) and Christmas is a blessing for everyone. 


Dieu benis ou,

Dan

Saturday, November 21, 2009 extra

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5hYb-YBOPdzyBKF0WINIgbG6uBifwD9C36VTG0


a link to a story found on the front page of my blog, I found it there and it is pretty good reading.  about kids around the world, and how we adults treat them.  I think Jesus had it right when He said we (adults) need to be more like the kids, not the other way around. 

Saturday, November 21, 2009

So things here are settling in, and becoming slightly chaotic both at the same time.  as an update, over the last few weeks, Gary has become more present in the house, working in the Bible school area, and getting new things done for the orphanage, so his time for school has basically vanished.   I have taken over as principal of the school, and with Nancy Hibbard, the new secretary, we are slowly trying to implement some improvements in the school.  So I guess the role things are settling in, and the chaos is of my own making!

As I have been here a full year and a part of another, I slowly gain a vision of how life, culture, things work here.  Having some background as a baseball coach in the states when my kids were little, and being exposed to a higher level of select baseball with traveling teams has given me a view of people in authority over a team, both good and bad.  It seems I am falling back on my coaching time to view this as trying to build a team of people to accomplish goals.  Ok, guys today we are going to learn to bunt....   So we are developing a plan to try and get more order into the school, a more focused plan and start a process of evaluation of the school to see what assets we have and how best to use them to help these kids grow.  I also look back on my own parenting life and feel a great sense of remorse that I didn't have these things figured out better when I actually had kids of my own at home.  I love my son's greatly, but I can see now the places I failed them more clearly since I have responsibility for 70+ kids now.  And in turn, this places me more squarely in front of God, seeking His mercy and grace, both for my mistakes and for my son's futures. 

So, in school we will, over time, become more old school, as this is what I know.   Hopefully it will be an improved version though.   Kids are disciplined regularly as needed.  The level of responsibility for the kids in how they do and more importantly, how they put forth effort will be raised.  I am becoming more aware of some of the advantages of American culture, while becoming even more aware of the disadvantages. American kids are exposed to so many things, different ideas and such, that it stimulates conceptual thinking in a way that is almost completely lacking here.   My hope is we can in some way bridge that gap and help build concepts in these kids, and use that in a more proactive way to share Jesus with them.  Each day I become more aware of my complete inability to accomplish this, I am not an educator.  But I know that God equips and provides and in this my faith is built by relying on Him even more.  I guess since I know I am not really a teacher, I will be what I can be, which is maybe a coach and planner, and let God do the rest.   And now for your viewing pleasure, some pictures of our kids.

These kids have a lot of backgrounds.  some are well of Haitians, some were restaveks in the States, some were kicked out of their homes and sent to a country they really didn't know because of step parents.  For whatever reason we are all in the same place now, and hopefully we can change their lives in a good way. 

thanks for reading, I now return you to your local stations.  remember, if this had been a real emergency, you probably wouldn't have gotten the message anyway.      :)

Bondye benis ou                                                                                                                                          

Dan                                                                                                                                                               

Sunday November 15, 2009

pictures of our broken bridge.  if anyone knows what I did to make the type start in the middle of the page, and how I can fix it, please let me know!    the downtown bridge clogs up with garbage each time it rains and floods the downtown area with mud, debris, garbage, sewage, etc.    so they finally got around to knocking down the old bridge and they are putting in a new one!    this will take months to get done though.  first pic is as you approach the bridge that isn't there anymore from the north side.  next is of the concrete forms being placed, then we have the street level (people standing in background) where the old street was, and hopefully the level the new street will be there.   fun in St. Marc!    we have to drive around old, worse roads to get around the roadblock here, but eventually it will be an improvement.   tried to load video this morning w/o success.  will work on that and hopefully have that mastered to start sending weekly video of life here.

plans for me sliding into the principal's job here are going along.  Gary and Caroline, Nancy and I had a long discusstion this morning about it and I think it will go fine.  Nancy is our secretary, score reviewer, painter, excel spreadsheet person, and generally what ever else we need.   Many skills needed here to give organization and good information to make decisions on.   I expect the next few months will be hectic with the transition, but it seems God is busy at opening doors here again for me.   I have my audiology equipment here and I hope to get to the local hospital to start discussions for space after Thanksgiving.  by the first of the year, maybe hearing testing will be going on in St. Marc.  that's all for  now, everyone take care in the Midwest. 

Bondye benis ou                                                                                                                                       

Dan                                                                                                                                                              

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Yes, I know I am not posting much.   I have to admit the "thrill" of blogging has worn off.  I am feeling less inclined to attempt to put my day, thoughts and emotions in a couple of paragraphs.   I feel like I can't really do it well unless I try to impart part of how it effects me and I also know that many really don't want that.  I have no problem with others feeling like their day is busy enough to only want the highlights, I remember life there believe it or not!      I know I often only wanted the bottom line, and now from the other side, the bottom line seems so inadequate.  

ANYWAY, as principal of the school now (I think I mentioned that, right?)  the kids and staff kind of look at me a little differently now, and that is ok.   I think the initial year of dealing with your own stuff while here is winding down some, and I don't feel the need to try and solve all the problems of everyone here now because.....drum roll, please.....I can't.      We are instituting some new procedures for dealin with rampant cheating in the school and with the obvious lack of basic math skills.   We will have, every morning (as soon as we have enough flash cards to do it with)  about a 20 minute drill in addition, subtraction, multiplication and division right after the opening and prayer.   The kids have some serious deficincies in these skills and it shows in their work, so I expect after a few months of this, that won't be an issue anymore.  Those that can test out of the skill will move on the next one, decreasing class size so those struggling will get more help until everyone can do them all.   Nancy Hibbard, our new office administrator,  is doing a very good job of organizing the office and getting information to where it needs to go.  With the change of procedures in the taking of tests, teachers won't have to grade the tests anymore, leaving more time for hands on teaching.  We all hope this is going to improve the kiids skills and abilities and give them more time for study. 

Personally, I am struggling some with health stuff.   I seem to be getting sick on about a 3 day cycle.  Not bad but just enough to make life slightly less enjoyable!   Today is a good day...so far.   I had similar problems last year, so I guess this is just life in Haiti for me.  Eventually it seemed to ease off and the last part of the year was better, so I will hope for the same now.   I have finally gotten all my audiology equipment here, though I have no idea when or where this may be used yet.   I am just praying for doors to open if this is in my future here, and if not, I am fine with it also.   I have a fellow missionary who has a friend coming to visit who needs a hearing test, so I hope to get back into it a little when he arrives in a few weeks.  We'll see where it goes from there. 

We have some new students in the older classes.   Jephtae returned to school and is showing a better attitude and willingness to work and seek help.   Another new student is Termitus, and he is showing what may be to this untrained eye some learning disabilities.     He tries hard though and is bright, so we will do our best to help him thru it.   Christella is from the states, she is 15 and has a bit of the American attitude, though she is a very nice girl and, with recent "encouragement" seems to be trying more and is finishing more tests.   Tanya (her real name is about 285 letters long so I call her Tanya)  is about 12-13, talks quietly but definitely talks, enjoys her day at school, has been to the states and really doesn't want to return.  She has a small cousin in our preschool class (don't know the name) and Tanya wants to get her to the states when she is older, but she tells me she likes Haiti and doesn't like the culture or lifestyle in the States.    I guess to many that is surprising, but having been here some, it really doesn't surprise me much anymore.  It is a difference in cultures and values, and what Americans want, many Haitians don't want.  I am glad she is able to make that judgement.   Yes, I will try to remember to get pictures to send, I know I suck at remembering that. 

Almost forgot, found out last night.   Remember Kesmy?     Kesmy has a sponsor to send him to Moody
Bible college for next year, full room and board, tuition is free for him!!!!!       His dream was to go to Moody and he has his start.    We are all so thrilled for him, I know those who know him will be also.   Had to edit the post, I had to add this.   Very good news.

things are going actually pretty well overall, I pray everyone back in the states is well. 

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

internet has been down, posting to blogger has been problem, not enough speed to get it done before it crashes.  hope this goes.   anticipate repair this week.   things going well at school,  making some changes to help kids reduce the effort spent on cheating!     weather is very warm, sleeping even with a fan leaves a soaked bed in the morning.   hope everyone is well in central America. take care will send more later.

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Friday, Oct. 23, 2009

yesterday had an interesting experience.  I drive the kids home after school...the smaller kids and some bigger kids and family/staff who live distances away from school.  Well, as we are making the rounds, the kids begin this chant thing.  Nancy Hibbard, another missionary working here this year had come with me for the ride (and the air conditioning)  and we were trying to figure out what they were doing.  after awhile we figured it out...they were clapping and cheering for each kid as we came to their stop and when they got out of the back of the truck.  It was just really amazing to hear and be around.   We have several small kids, 3 years old and in preschool.  They were just so happy to hear their names and that people were cheering for them.   We also have an older girl, about 10 I believe, who is mentally handicapped.  She is new this year and talks very little if at all, but she smiles and really enjoys being in the preschool and making pictures and the other activities, participating as she can.  When it came to her stop, she was just absolutely overjoyed, as I looked thru the back and thru the rear view mirror, the kids were cheering her name and clapping for her.  I will go out on a limb and state this is very likely the first time she has ever had anyone really do anything close to this for her, and she was so happy.   Her mother came out to get her from the bus and was overjoyed as well.   All the parents were smiling and happy to see their kids have that kind of support from the other kids. there were many smiles that afternoon on the ride home for the kids....and a few more after they were all dropped off.  It really touched my heart that they did this, and to see the reaction from the kids and parents, I think many hearts were touched.   Today I got a chance to go over to the preschool building to gather some information.   The handicapped girl, Kristi, was there and I just gave her a hug and told her that Jesus lover her, and she smiled and voiced a response.   Just one syllable, couldnt' understand it, but she responded.  For me, it was the high point of the day.  Gary was gone to Port to pick up a visitor so I didn't have the truck to take the kids home today again....we'll see on Monday if it becomes a habit to cheer for each other.  I hope it does.   For some kids here, there is little encouragement if any from family.  Life can be so hard that , well, parents just don't have it to give.   It is a pretty cool thing to hear them cheer for each other.   A good day in Haiti.   

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Friday, Oct 23, 2009

not been blogging any, fighting a sinus infection and generally just dont' have much to say now.  school is going actually pretty well, some of the kids who seem to be resistant and not inclined to work did so more this week, so it went well.   'Gary has gone to Port to pick up a visitor today .    Norm is a friend of theirs who is a psychologist from PA, and will be here for a week or 10 days.   it is cooler, the dreaded 100+ weather front just never seems to make it here, so we now are just hoping for a little rain.   It is getting late in the season and it is dry, gardens are finished and food will likely get more expensive as we go into the rainy season.    We have a new store in town, called DeliMart.   and it has ice cream!     of course we never go there.........well, on that note, it's time to end and try to find some more antibiotics.  

Bondye benis ou

Dan

round two, October 17, 2009

forgot to add, I am reading a very good book titled "Too Small to Ignore" by Wes Stafford.  He is the CEO of Compassion International, and in it he relates his upbringing in a village in the Ivory Coast of West Africa, and his view of children and how we bring them up and how we don't bring them up, and the mission call to value children right now, as they are, at any age.  He talks of how in the West we separate our children from our ongoing lives thru toy's, sitters, the hunt for money to support the lifestyle choices we make, and the damage it can do to our kids.  I am only thru a small part of it, so I cannot judge the whole book.  However, I wholeheartedly would recommend it to anyone who works with kids, has kids, is around kids or deals with them in any way....pretty much everyone.    It has opened my eyes to facet's of my own upbringing, and how I brought up, or didn't bring up, my son's.  If we would engage our kids in the way he recommends, not seek the worldly stuff beyond what is truly enough, not beyond it to what we "simply must have", our lives, our children's lives, and our communities would be changed, I am fairly sure.   The Bible calls us to talk of the issues of life as we walk, sit and spend time with our families, and this is what he is advocating.   Not just to talk about life, but to actually live our lives with our kids, getting them engaged in what we do and how we do it, and affirming them as important parts of our lives and our families as early as possible.  just wanted to give a shout out for a book that has showed me a lot in not many pages. 

October 17, 2009

first week fini!    not a bad first week.   I have a pretty good class.  Pony, Sophonie, James, Jeptha from last year.   Spencer, a missionary kid from the states here till Christmas, and Termitus, a Haitian from the states.  overall the school is organized better as far as class time and teacher's.  It is quieter and the students seem to get more done.  We have two new teen age girls, Tia and Christella, placed in a class that has been exclusively boys for 3 years now, and it is producing the expected results.   the boys keep doing things like breaking their pencil points so they can go to the sharpener and be close to the girls desk's and talk, etc.  But so far no major problems. 

Yesterday we had the chapel service and it went well, worship was good.  It still touches me to see people from outside on the street stop and listen and try to look in.  Hopefully it is a benefit for them. 

This morning I helped skin chicken for the after noon meal that Nancy is helping to prepare.   We will have chicken, rice and beans (!), fried plantains and picklies, a hot cabbage/slaw type of dish.   very tasty stuff. 

still hot here, but the bad expected heat keeps getting put back a few days at a time on the weather site.   However, we are within 2 days now and the forecast for Monday is still 106, so it appears the other shoe is about to drop.   Again the forecast for next week is for temps from 103-107 all week. 

October is one of the more rainy times of year and so far there has been little rain.  It apparently was a very dry summer, again in the rainy season, and instead of floods and storms Haiti may be facing the opposite now....drought.    The garden area of Pont Sunday where most of the area's vegetables are grown has already dried up, and food is being brought in from Port au Prince, which just drives up prices.  Another food spike people really can't afford.   Rose, our cook is very thin, I would guess 30 pounds under her weight last spring...and I am told she has gained weight since the start of September and Gary/Carolines return!   Summer was survived by all relatively well, but some of the staff are so thin.   Another season of eating is at hand for them, and they are happy about it, as you would expect. 

still waiting for shipment of the audiometer here.   When it arrives I hope to get to the hospital and talk with the admin there.   Apparently Dr. Paul Farmer has taken over the operation of the hospital here.  He is a pretty well known missionary docctor in Haiti who has been active in medical care here for years.   I hope I can set up some means to start testing by end of the year, and we'll see where it goes.  There are the legal things to do, get permits and stuff, but that shouldn't be too hard.  I am actually kind of excited about it.  I haven't done a hearing test now in over a year, and I think I would enjoy getting my hand back into it. 

All in all, pretty much what I expected, life goes on, it is good to see the other missionaries here and trade stories of travel and travails.   Also of the good things, like the mamba program expansion, the police investigation into the Rollings situation which has uncovered police corruption in the area and which has started a more complete investigation of the justice system around Pierre Payan.   Hopefully the locals will be able to get a better course of justice for themselves as a result.  The heartaches continue also, as another baby girl died this week in MacDonald.  Life in Haiti.   will write again soon.  

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Wednesday, October 14,2009

rain last night, very welcomed.  started around 8:30 or so,  continued for some time, cooled things off quite a bit, kept the dust down today.   It is amazing how the smallest things seem so much bigger when the distractions of western civ aren't there.   we all oohed and aahed at the wind and rain and just stayed in the breeze of it and enjoyed.  

another day at school, things going pretty well.  I have pictures to load, hopefully it will.

this is Ann Rose the school cook,  that woman can do things with rice!   In the background is Elna, another school worker. 

and these two are Rutney and Ashterline.  amazing how when the camera comes out, the girls show up!

so things are going pretty well, just hoping the weather will cool off some.  it sure seems cold in the  St. Louis area now.  don't know how you will all deal with the snow in a few months.  (sorry, but when it's 105, you get a little mean!)   everyone have a good day, hope to have a video soon. 

Bondye benis ou      Dan

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Well, the first two days of school have and gone.  We had a missionary meeting Sunday at Chris and Leslie Rollings place, they have built a place next to the other house that was originally on the property.   very nice place with open windows, shade tree's and such.  Shade tree's are highly prized in Haiti this week, with temp's set to reach and stay at about 105 or higher till at least next Wednesday.   By afternoon, neither the students or teachers can focus well or get much done.  I will testify to that.  I am drinking water as much as I can, but as I was returning from the trip to drop kids off from school, I got that cotton  mouth feeling. Last night I got up around 4 am, and after getting back to bed, felt like I was laying down in a pool of water just from my own sweat.   Ah, the missionary life is truly an adventure!  

Things are getting settled in for every one here, though changes keep coming up.  Just being flexible enough to "roll with the punches" seems to be the most useful attribute anyone can have here.  Kids refusing to obey, parents not helping with the process, people disappearing with money given to build chairs for the smaller kids, life just rolls on.   But it really isn't that bad, the heat just magnifies everything.   It is pretty much the topic of conversation most of each day, but we are trying to just get thru it, as it WILL cool down sometime.  It has to.   Right?            hope everyone is well,  bundle up in the midwest!

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Sun Oct 11
High 100°     Low 78°

Mon Oct 12
High 102°  Low 76°

Tue Oct 13
High 104°  Low 77°

Wed Oct 14
High 105°  Low 77°

Thu Oct 15
High 104°  Low 77°

Fri Oct 16
High 106°  Low 77°

Sat Oct 17
High 104° Low79°

Sun Oct 18
High 105  Low 79°



This is the weather forecast for next week for St. Marc, Haiti.   Each day also includes about a 30-60% chance of showers so the humidity will be fairly high.    Even in Haiti, the people are saying it is as hot as they can remember it being.   I feel like I have lost about 5 pounds of sweat today, so I am trying to drink water as much as possible.   Tomorrow we will go out and get some more fans just to move the air around some,  At least we have, and can use, electricity fairly regularly.   I am afraid I will short out my computer because of the sweat on my hands!   Suddenly the cold, rainly weather of the St.Louis area doesn't sound quite so bad.   I will try and get some pic's, maybe some video tomorrow to post.   If anyone has any cooler weather prayers, now would be a good time to use them!      We will get thru it, you just don't do as much for as long and avoid the mid day heat as much as possible. 

Everyone bundle up at home!  

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Saturday, Oct 10, 2009

I'm here.   easy trip, flight was less than half full, few Haitians, mostly missionaries!    two large groups with the same t shirt's and all.   Got thru the airport in about 10 minutes....unbelievably easy.   Gary was right there, we went and got some stuff he needed and the ride back was wonderful up to about 5 miles from St. Marc, so overall it was not bad at all.    It is REALLY HOT, sweated all night, soaked this morning at 7:30.  I am already drinking stuff for dehydration, I really don't want to go there again.  

Haiti is still Haiti.   Barb called this morning and said a baby that a family in MacDonald had given her about 2 days ago to care for died in her sleep last night.   The baby was 9 months old and weighed almost 9 pounds.   She never had a chance.   Barb is going to the family to talk to them and let them know.  In such a sad way, it feels like the same place I left.   Not that it would change in a few months, or because of my perspective of it, but it does kind of slap you in the face some.    So, there is another unnamed family to pray for.  Tomorrow is missionary meeting so I will catch up with everyone.  take care everyone.

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Ok, Blogger is really starting to....upset me.  so I am experimenting with a new site.  for awhile, check out the blog at daninhaiti@wordpress.com.   we'll see if that site is any better.  

Dan

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

shipped out 6 boxes of stuff today, one more to go tomorrow.  getting things arranged for the trip.  had a great meeting this morning with Mike, my old friend (yes, we are getting OLD Mike).   we talked about life and where God has put us and where we are going; it is amazing how we influence each other in our walks by just being transparent before each other.  He has exciting things going on in his life and with his kids; problems and issues like we all have too.  I am getting more excited about......I feel odd saying this, but it feels like "going home".    God will work it out, I am sure.  I already miss my family, friends and especially my son's Luke and Aaron.   I have not gotten to spend nearly enough time with them this summer.  I hope some time as I get arranged they can come and visit in Haiti.   had a friend talk of a mission trip in the spring to Haiti, maybe we can arrange that.   It seems that it is all falling into place; Wayne has gotten me set up electronicaly, computorially (expanding the language base!), and movie wise.  He and Melissa spent gadzooks amount of money for food for the mission; we are all grateful for that.   it seems the door is there, now to walk thru it.    reminds me of the Stephen Curtis Chapman song of the Great Adventure, and of the song Dive.    haven't tested the water yet, but I am sure it is ok.   I am looking forward to rice and beans, sweating and power outages.  What more can you ask of in life?    :)    

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Monday, October 5m 2009

time flies by, decisions get made and life continues.  went shopping yesterday with Wayne and Melissa, and have oodles of stuff to send to Haiti.  Carolyn, don't get mad, but we have some junk food.  I promise I'll eat it all as soon as possible!    (sharing of course with those willing to partake in the removal of the junk food).  I am packing likely too many things, but I know enough now to be willing to leave what I bring this time.  at least a lot of it.  weather here is horrible....temps around 40's at night, 60's in day, it feels like Siberia.  the sun helps some, but Haiti is sounding better,, I can't wait to glisten.  :)      Church yesterday was great, good message on unity in the body, got to see many friends and say goodbye, and received many commitments to give childrens vitamins next week.   that is very encouraging, as the difference it can make in a malnourished kid is amazing. 

so I hope Haiti is ready for me.  I haven't changed much over the summer (with the notable exception of a few pounds)  I assume Haiti hasn't changed much either.  I am looking forward to the new road though.  Less bouncing is good for these old bones.  have to go tape and ship boxes now, dont' worry Gary, I'll be there before they arrive so I'll pay the shipping.  see everyone soon.    I am already missing my family, but the weather these crazy blans have here is driving me back.  :)

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Well, I guess I need to get back in the habit of doing this, as I expect to be leaving hopefully next week.  A set of circumstances had my attention and kept me ill at ease about leaving.   Mainly my own need to fix things, cure ills, save the world, etc,  standard stuff.   Monday night I prayed about it, as I did Tuesday morning.   I got a few e mails, made a few phone calls that morning and, voila, it all fell together.  I knew, you know, knew, then it was time to go.   I have been putting things together since that point, and I know it is time to go forward.   I am looking forward to going from morning temps here in the high 40's/ low 50's to the oven of St. Marc.....NOT!      But it will all be good I am sure.  It promises to be a wonderful year with all kinds of surprises..some good, some not, I'm sure.     But since I truly feel I am supposed to be there, it will be what it will be and that will be ok.  

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Monday, September 21, 2009

still just sorting, thinking, attempting to get my audiology stuff under wrap so I can bring it, ship other stuff.  had a HUGE encouragement Sunday when a friend of mine, Robin, told me that her son is planning on giving me a large donation towards the equipment.   it seems that the things that need to happen to get me to Haiti keep happening.   I hear it is very hot and dry there now in St. Marc, but I am planning on all that changing when I get there....what the heck?    if things are going like this now, might as well shoot for the moon on everything.  so I am planning a temperature break of at least 10 degrees, with some regular showers to cool things off and settle the dust.    now for those lottery tickets....     :)

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

well,it seems that things just continue to "work out" for me  to return to Haiti.  I received some good financial advice from a friend, my ex wife.....yes, sometimes it works that way....and it  seems that I will be able to attend "Haiti University" this year w/o fearing poverty when I return.....IF I return.   has to do with the fact that I am destitute, w/o an income this year and the tax advantages of poverty!      regardless, I know things will be ok.  getting equipment set up to bring with me, and getting arrangements made.   lookin forward to  returning about 1st week of Oct, so I hope it has cooled off by then.....LOL.   

it has been good to come home and see family and friends, but I know that I am supposed to be in Haiti at this time in my life.  I don't pretend to know how it will work out one day to the next, but that is in much more capable hands than mine.  I hope to be able to post pictures at least this year with the internet connection we have, so as to be able to share more of what happens there.   all is working out how it will,  see everyone in Haiti soon. 

Bondye benis ou.

Dan

Tuesday, Aug 4, 2009

isn't it amazing how God works in us?   I am having one of those God mornings where I feel His grace and love all over, where He affirms and comforts me.   everywhere I go, He leads me.    as I sit here, listening to the local Christian station on the radio, and reflecting on the last few hours, a song called "here I am" is on, talking about sending me into the field.   I think of the people in Haiti, the kids in school, the innumerable needs I cannot possibly fill, and I know all I can do is share God's love and let Him provide for me and those around me, both thru me and thru His grace and power.  I have read posts from the Rollings in Haiti, from Tara Livesay, citing a site from some missionaries in China about small seeds and how God works despite our feelings of failure.    God just seems to be speaking to me in a way He hasn't before.......or very likely that I just have not been listening very well.     God has been speaking to me about grace and mercy and I am getting it in a way I never have before.   anyone who knows me knows it's not because I just got smarter.    just another miracle of God, thank you.   my need to accomplish is fading, all I need to do is follow and do what is given me....and know God will work it out His way.    what a relief it is to know it isn't on me anymore to produce results, just to love those He gives me to love today.    very cool, our God, very cool indeed.

Bondye benis ou, really.

Dan

Tuesday, Aug 4, 2009

Monday, August 31, 2009

spending time finding stuff, trying to decide on audiology equipment, rethinking how I packed last year and how I will do a MUCH better job this year.....also trying to realize that, for whatever I would call better or worse.....it will all work out.   I have re engaged in reading the blogs of the Haitian missionaries still there, and it still connects with me. I hope it continues to do so when I arrive! 

remembering all the names of the staff, kids, etc.,   I am not good at.   I have been looking thru some pic's for help, and it does help.  I remember joy, frustration, etc., with most pic's.   this year will be different it appears; more help (at least for awhile), more visits, possibly more kids.   all will go as it will.   take care to all in Haiti, avoid the storms as best you can.

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Wednesday Aug 26, 2009

So, it seems that as I was sitting around, with my back hurting and all, I actually began to think about what I really was going to do this fall.    I guess about 5 last night, it occurred to me that I really was going back to Haiti, and something changed in me.  I actually went out to the garage and exercised for about 10 minutes (bad back limitations) and came in and started to work on lists and plans.  I woke up this morning, my back feels 100% better, only slight pulling sensation in certain positions, and I am cleaning my bedroom, finding all the stuff that has sifted down to the bottom that I will need for Haiti.  It's occurred to me that having rediscovered intent and purpose, I feel better, have more energy and actually want to do more than complain of a bad back. 

makes me think of that garden thing long ago.   This Adam guy had it going, the whole world to himself, God as his buddy, but he still needed something to do, a reason to get out of bed.  So God gave him this garden thing to hang out in and take care of.  Well, Eve came along and......I digress.    :)        But it really was good when Adam was hanging out with God, being buddies and doing his thing.   

I hope I remember this post when I am back in Haiti, it is 4000 degrees and there is no power or water or gas.    Someone remind me then ok?     Or, on second thought, remind me after the power comes back on and I have a fan to sit by.  

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Monday, August 24, 2009

Amazing how stupidity seems to follow people (ok, me) everywhere. As an update on summer activities, I did not get the part time job at the VA, which would have paid anpil cob! Instead, I eventually got a job as a cart pusher at a Wal Mart in Cahokia, IL, about 11 miles from my house. The job I actually enjoyed, it was about helping people, and when it was done, I could walk away and not even think about it. the people there were nice also. Well, I hurt my neck pushing carts one day and the pain was.....painful, very painful. I have some bulging disc's in my upper back and lower back from.....previous stupidity.... and the pushing of the carts caused it to flare up again. Spent about a week getting over it, decided that at 52 I just can't be that stupid anymore so I quit that job. Later I helped a friend in packing and shipping computers, monitors and peripherals to send to schools across the country, which is his job. Wayne was being nice and giving me some part time work (yes, that Wayne), but again, my stupidity trumped anyone elses good intentions. I was loading a monitor into a box.....a really big, heavy, old Dell monitor into a box flat on the ground....and my grip slipped. As I tried to shift to catch the weight....I injured my low back again. So that has been about a week now, and while better, I am still nowhere ready for my next really stupid adventure, it will take me some time to work up to that.

When I came home this summer I was determined to just listen to God, or at least try to, and not predetermine what path He may lead me. So I did not assume I would stay here, or return to Haiti, or anything. I was, and am trying to let God be God a little more (lot?) in my life, and the doors of America seem to have closed this summer to me. No VA job, no part time audiology gig to go with. And for whatever reason, it seems Gary and Caroline will still have me back in Haiti. So it appears I will be returning this fall again, though likely not in time for school, sometime in October. I have not arranged anything yet, I need to get audiology equipment to bring, etc. And, I go without the emotional component I had last year. What I mean is that I go without expectations that anything I could do will change things significantly. I still have a heart for the people of Haiti, but more so, it seems I have learned that I can only be effective in anything I do by following God. I fully expect that I will forget that more times than I remember, but at least it is a start.

Reading Carolines blog, the area in St. Marc is w/o regular power, as the generator in Gonaives is out. So it looks like generator only, limited internet and other electrical conveniences. Also, the other private Christian school in the town closed unexpectedly, so there will be way more students than we have room or books for, so it seems I may be moderately useful this year, if only to keep some type of order with the kids. I pray it works out, I know it will, and I again try to look at today, and let tomorrow take care of itself. Sounds like another, greater adventure is in store for me. I will miss my son's, family and friends. But I think it will be ok.

Bondye benis ou

Dan

Tuesday, Aug 4, 2009

He lives!    summer is passing quickly here,  wonderful weather, rarely above the low 90's.   I am working at Wal Mart in a nearby town part time....and while the pay is a lot less than I made before, the lack of stress is an amazing benefit.   I hope to be back in Haiti this fall, maybe not until January though, for the lack of stress personally is stressful, however to my bank account!

while home I have been reading and re reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning.  love the book, written by an recovering alcoholic ex Catholic priest about grace.   It seems to me that I have limited the grace I have allowed God to show me in my life, and by doing so, limited the grace I have been willing to show others.   I have always had this thing, "...grace is wonderful and I love God for it,  but.......".      I am gradually giving up the but's (sorry!) and just accepting grace as it is.   In doing so, I find it easier to accept the lack of perfection of others, as I become more able to accept my own issues.   It seems that this truth will set you free stuff really has something to it.   Who knew?    :)

as I look at a possible return to Haiti, I think far less of what I can do in a worldly fashion to change others lives, because in reality their circumstances aren't under my control.   I realize that it is very likely everyone else on the planet understood that, but it has taken me a little time to accept it myself.   It seems to me that accepting God's grace and then sharing it with others is in a very real sense all we can really do with our lives.   The trick is to find an outlet for it.    This goes back to something I talked about this past spring, about actually living with Haitians in community and sharing life with them.   Very scary at first, not as much now (which admittedly may be because I am a few thousand miles away)  but also very real now.  it seems that the less I care about someone's circumstances, the more I can care about them personally, as a human being.    That may not be the way others are wired, but it seems to be my way.  I think I confused a person's circumstances with their life, and that appears to be two different things to me now.   God willing, I hope to be able to share that with others.

Oh, and the important part.....I have always had a music thing.   Never learned to play anything, took a few guitar lessons when young before those dreaded  "circumstances" changed.   I know think I may want to pursue the drums.....so for those close to me.....ear plugs may be advisable!

Bondye benis ou.  

Thursday June 25, 2009

well it's been almost a month since I've logged into blogger, almost forgot how. I am "home" in the US now and trying to fit back into life here....for awhile at least. it seems that life in the states goes on without slowing down, and trying to jump back on the moving merry go round is kind of hard. there is no routine really for me here yet. I have spent way too much money and eaten far too many meals "out on the town"...including Applebee's and Burger King. so I need to cut back...especially since work is not jumping out at me to obtain. have been in contact with a friend who has contacts with many audiologists and he knows of no summer vacation needs for work, so I need a plan B.....likely fast food or pizza delivery, IF I can get it.

I am working thru the process of deciding whether to return to Haiti next year. as I said, work has not been forthcoming, so again it becomes a matter of faith. as I wrestle with God on this, if I feel Haiti is where He wants me, Iwill go and not worry about the money. and if not, well,then I will find whatever work I can. I do have a chance to get some used audiology equipment very cheaply, $1000 for a used audiometer and tympanometer. that would help if I go back to be able to maybe do some work there to make some money. I know it will all work out.....sometimes I just wish I could peak at the end of the chapter to see how things work out! I hope and pray that Al and Bev, Gary and Caroline, Barb and the other missionaries home for summer are having good summers. And that those still there are surviving the heat! I see there has been no storm activity yet and I praise God for that! we'll see how summer goes along. I miss some things there. I do miss the kids and staff, they all became a part of my life. I don't miss so many other things, but I guess that is kind of the way it was being in Haiti and thinking of the US. it is good to see my son's and catch up on their lives, to see friends and see where their lives are going. I guess I just have to find a way to live in both places at the same time. or maybe 6 months here, 6 months there. life is good to have such problems.

Bondye benis ou.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

This is my last post from Haiti. We will be taking a short day trip today and leaving tomorrow morning, so this evening will be packing and such. I can't summarize 9 months of living a different life, nor can I summarize how much I have learned here. As I return to the States, I hope to be able to make what I have learned here part of my life at home. Thanks to everyone who helped thru support and prayers. There were times when prayer was likely the one thing that kept me going. I thank Gary and Caroline for the opportunity to be here, I thank Al/Bev/Barb and the rest of the missionary group here for friendship and mutual support. It's time to go home.

Bondye benis ou.

Monday, June 1, 2009

yesterday we went to the Felmy's to celebrate Mike and Mirian's 50th anniversary...except that Mike was stuck in Florida, unable to fly his small plane to Haiti due to weather. so a good time was had by...most everyone. Got to see the spectacular view from the roof of the Felmy's clinic, overlooking a small valley and the coast. I have pic's but again I cannot post them.

today we took the team down to the orphanage to see the kids and the community. we were there till about 2, then returned and I went out again about 5 with Elizabeth to.....rent her a new apartment!! Yes, it is done, she has a 2 room place for her and her kids to stay in. It was a struggle to find a place she could afford but God provided and they have a place to stay for at least one year.

Hot and humid.....over and over. so I am getting used to it....just in time to leave. I will post tomorrow evening, I think, as a farewell. it has been a fabulous experience, my view of the world will never be the same, and I hope and pray that I can use that to serve God in the time He allows me to. If you ever get a chance to do something like this, you owe it to yourself to do it. You will be changed forever. I know God's grace abounds in poverty and deprivation. I truly hope to return, if and when He will's it. that's all for now.

Bondye benis ou.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

so Gary and Caroline took the visitors from the IAM program to the Bible class graduation today. around 12 or so, I went upstairs and saw the temp as 89 inside the office area they have upstairs. Knowing this to be a completely false reading, I put it into the sunlight on the porch. Within 7 minutes it has risen 15 degrees to 104, at which time I quit. Now, there may be technical reasons why the reading in the sun is inaccurate, but I prefer to not hear them or believe them, even if they are valid and reasonable and even TRUE. The sun has been absolutly brutal the last few days. Rose showed up for the trip to Montrois and was sweating and complaining about the heat at 5:30 in the morning!

very interesting post from Tara Livesay about the Missionaries of Charity in Port, an organization started by Mother Teresa years ago. They care for sick children, getting them back to health and reuniting them with their families. The place is overcrowded and understaffed, but the kids get fed and they are alive. Many families, when faced with a very sick baby, just quit feeding it, thinking the food should go to healthier, stronger kids who may make it, thereby giving a death sentence to the sick baby. Managing resources is a part of poverty, and feeding a baby who likely won't live has a poor cost/return ratio. Cold, but true. That decision is made every day in Haiti and many other 3rd world countries like Haiti and poorer. I was reading about Sudan today, the average family lives on about $100 a year. that's about 36 cents a day to feed...everyone. I see the kids in the school here and I realize that many of them are actually well off for Haiti. They have clothes, food and can go to school. Some aren't so lucky and attend school on scholarships....another way to say Gary and Caroline let them attend for free. And the days go by, one after another. I realize that sanity is a real gift at times. It is too easy to just want to go bonkers on yourself. I know God will lead me to where He wants me in the future. It may be here, it may be somewhere else, it may be home. Wherever it is, I hope I never look at people again like I did before. That would be shameful. did I say it was hot here?

Bondye benis ou.

Friday, May 29, 2009

today was graduation day for school, or more correctly, for Kesmy St. Louis. The closing ceremonies for school were wonderful for the kids, they really enjoyed the music and all. Myberson gave a very good speech, praising Kesmy for his work, and challenging someone in the next group to be a leader for the school. I gave out report cards for my class, and had the chance to talk about Kesmy a bit. He has overcome everything and graduated high school, and is headed to college in the states if all plans hold true. He is a truly amazing young man.

It was very difficult at times to be there, as many of the workers asked me if I was returning next year, and I had to answer truthfully that I do not know at this time. The kids became more like my own today, not that they would ever replace my son's, but I felt very close to them and I tried to encourage them to continue in their schooling. There are some very bright kids at El Shaddai, and I pray they will get opportunities to achieve. Even one of the young men who has been somewhat of a problem this year, came out and said he has gotten saved while in school, he has given his heart to Jesus. For those who read who are not Christian, I know things like this can be very difficult to read. I was like that at one time. Now, however, it makes everything worthwhile to hear that. It was a good day today......even if it is 185 degrees with humidity to match. It is tre cho now in Haiti, and everyone is complaining about the heat, even the Haitians. I hope and pray it is a good summer for Haiti, they need it desperately.

It is downhill from here now, odd's and ends, and packing for home. It has been an amazing year, truly amazing for me. The only thing that would have made it better is if my son's would have been here with me, but they are not on board with sweating in Haiti....yet!

Bondye benis ou.

Thursday, May 28,2009

Catching up on the last few days. Monday we did what was basically the last day of school, kids worked and got done the tests they could as they had no time to start new books. Tuesday was beach day...and I have the sunburn to prove it. I did use sunblock on my head and neck but my back is pretty torched. It was well worth it though. it was a decent beach, kind of rocky but that is pretty standard here. There are some sandy beaches but they cost a lot more to rent. we had the whole place to ourselves for a minimal amount, brought the cooks and our own food, and just played in the water, and the kids played some soccer. I have pictures that I will try to post, but again, Blogger has chosen me to make the upload example for someone. "don't be like him or your stuff won't upload". I chose to be the "pick up the little kids and throw them into the water" guy, and after awhile my arms were very tired as even the bigger kids....like Madame Homme.....wanted me to throw them into the water. it was much fun, the food was good, what more is there?

It was interesting to see the cooks work there. they were in a small room, using charcoal to cook with and it was very hot, but they complained not and Rose asked all of us if the food was good afterwards. She just wants to make sure she did a good job, cooking is what she does for us and she enjoys knowing she did well at it. There were some families that lived there managing the place, and they ate also, Rose made sure of it. Things you just won't see in the states.

Wednesday was technically the last day of classes, but we got little done, just a few tests for a few kids, and mostly practice for the closing ceremony. I'll be honest; I don't enjoy ceremonies. But they have one for the kids and they seem to enjoy it I guess, so I'll endeavor to persevere. It will be at 10 am, earlier than they usually do it, but the rainy season has started a bit early and afternoon rain is pretty usual the last 2 weeks or so, so it is this or get everyone wet.

Today we will be getting report cards together for the kids, starting the close down process at school, getting the big tarp up for the ceremony for shade for the kids, and some household stuff. Gary went to Port yesterday and picked up two visitors, Sharon and Brittany, who are here for the Bible class graduation Saturday, which I will not attend, again ceremonies don't do it for me. Sunday is missionary meeting, and then it is packing and watching the clock tick until Wednesday morning for the flight home. The house needs closed up and all, so there will be things to do, but it won't be too bad. time flies here. .....pic's wont load

Bondye benis ou

Tuesday May 26, 2009

well, it's 5:30 and I've been up now for about 45 min, and I am covered with sweat. it is beach day for the kids at school, so we've been up getting a few things together for the trip and I feel like I need a shower already. a few issues came up and they will be dealt with on the way to Mountrois. Gary has taken Rose and Elna, the cooks, and a bunch of stuff there early to start the noon meal which will be.....wait for it......RICE AND BEANS!!!!! we can cook it ourselves and it saves a bunch of money. to purchase a plate at the beach place for all 70 or so people would be hyper costly, so we cook ourselves. the place is rented out for the school for the day, so it will be nice to have no "others" there to interfere. the kids can run and play soccer, venture into the water as they feel the courage (and that is an issue here; Haitians do not like the ocean generally) and throw sand....or rocks...as they see fit. should be fun for all (unless the aim on the rock throwing is good).

tomorrow Gary goes to Port to pick up a couple of visitors who are coming in for the graduation of the Bible school class. they have been running the school for 3 years now and the first graduates are finished, so the place they get their material from, IAM ministries, is sending someone to attend the graduation. that will be Saturday morning. Friday we will have the school closing ceremony and Kesmy's graduation, head of a class of one! Sunday will be missionary meeting, then it's get the school and house closed up as much as possible to leave on Wednesday for home. Gary and Caroline will leave next Monday, the 8th. Or, we hope they will. Sunday the 7th is another election since no one won the last time (you have to have one candidate get 50% and no one did) in the Senate elections. we have heard there is already trouble brewing for the election by those not happy with the election process, so G/C are hoping it does not spill over into demonstrations, or manifestations, as they are called here.

speaking of manifestations, the roads here are filled with mud and water now..... to fill in the blanks on that sentence, people manifest whenevere they get fed up and feel no one cares or listens to them....which is most of the time. Well, in one area of the roads here, there is a very bad spot of road that is washed out with large holes. Large rocks have been placed into the puddles of water to "manifest" the dissatisfaction with the roads, so everyone has to drive thru a small area of road, which is the worst part of the road. However as the water starts to recede you can see the burned remains of tires under the puddles....which is a previous manifestation....which is what causes much of the damage in the roads to begin with.....and causes the rains to wash away the damaged asphalt......which then begets the rock manifestation....which will cause some repairs to be done......until that is destroyed by the next manifestation. Got it?

actually there have been guys around town with transits taking sightings for stuff, who knows what, and we hope it is because of Preval's visit last week. elections are coming up so politicians do what they do....make a show to get votes. hopefully some improvements will come, but that is believed when seen and finished.

well, again I risk my computer by typing, I think I will short it out with my sweat, so that's it for today. Home is calling. :)

Bondye benis ou.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

the rains have slowed, today actually looks pretty sunny which is a good thing. I forget if I blogged about this but Preval was in our neighborhood looking at the flood damage. and the prevailing opinion was "that's nice", but no one really expects anything to happen, as is usual.

school is about finished. Friday we had final chapel service which was really an instruction period for the final ceremony next Friday. after the talking, we played some music and I began to think about the kids there. I don't know if I will see them again after this year, and it was tough. I have tried to put myself in a place where I don't expect much. I don't expect God to go along with my agenda, because I realize "my" agenda so often does not coincide with His...as was demonstrated with my being here this year! so if God provides the direction to return and the means, I will. If He does not and I never return, I am ok with that...at least I think I am, or I will be eventually. This summer will be an adventure just like coming here....going to a strange country with leaders who are idiots and a culture that has so many problems you can't count them. At least this time I will know the language!

as I have gotten to know the people here, not just the mission, I have begun to enter a little comfort zone. I take the kids home in the bus and if there is a problem, I know it will work out. I know enough Creole to let folks know that I don't know enough Creole. But I can struggle through most of the time. People have gotten to know that there is another blan in the neighborhood and it doesn't bother...most of them. I feel like I have grown as a teacher, which I am still not, but I understand the principles of the classroom now much better than I did when I was a student! I sort of understand some of the assumptions that the locals go by in how they deal with missionaries, and they are confusing and contradictory and....starting to make a little sense to me.

I guess, as I have blogged much about this, I have learned more about myself than anyone else. living in a 3rd world country, whatever that is, isn't the end of the world, just maybe the end of some of my presumptions, expectation and biases. It has become very real to me that not having constant internet, power, water, mobility, freedom, entertainment, etc., does not mean the end of the world. I guess I am comfortable enough in this life, and see many actual benefits of the simpler life, that I am relinquishing my need to have the world conform to me and gaining an little bit of ability of conforming to it. You see, it isn't mine. and that has become very real to me.

Kesmy will graduate next Friday, and move on with his life in the US, if all plans work out. He will be living in Michigan and his life will take a huge turn...however it goes. I don't assume that living in the US is any better now than anywhere else. The "comforts" are there but so much else is not. I pray that Kesmy will not be taken in by the "stuff" and stay true, as so many of us have struggled with. Next week there is school on Monday, beach day on Tuesday, Wednesday class (more rehearsal for final), Thursday off and Friday morning the ceremony. The Wednesday after that I come home. I know it is now feasible for everyone, but if you get a chance to see a place like Haiti, or spend more than a little time doing it, do it because whatever sacrifice you may make for it is worth it. I will never view the world the same way again. I can't because I know there are people "out there" who are a lot like me...sorry for them. And they are my brothers and sisters who have needs and can teach me things. I guess I finally get that part down deep, like I never did before.

Bondye benis ou.

no, pictures still won't load.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Well, things have calmed down here, it is constantly cloudy but the rain's have held off the last 24 hours or so and the forecast is for some sun the rest of the week...or it was as of yesterday afternoon.

the news is not as bad as it appeared but also potentially worse. that is the problem with "information" here.....you never really know how much is true or not. Take, for instance, Antonio, who told us his house was "destroyed" and he had no place to live with his family, including his wife and 3 kids of whom one is Ronid. WELL, it turns out that the walls are all intact, some water came down the hill and got in the house and some things got wet, and the roof leaks. Given some previous things occuring in the last few weeks, we have figured that Antonio was working the Walkers to give him money for his "disaster" which was actually pretty much all made up. On the other hand, several of the people reported that an 11 year old boy was swept away by flood waters farther down the hill where it had gathered more and had more force. Again, what do you believe? I pray it isn't true, but if it is, we all pray for the family.

yesterday a bulldozer came up the street and proceeded to move TONS of loose gravel deposited by the water up and down the road. The upshot is that the road in front of the house is filled with large rocks and mud.....exactly what we were hoping for! (NOT) and since the road was graded some, vehicles from the side roads are all parking there....so it is literally impossible to get the truck into the drive way here.

have I mentioned recently it is hot? the humidity today reached.....well, let's see. it rained yesterday so that must have been 100%. it rained later but only half as much as usual so that was 50%, and it was humid this morning but no rain so that was probably about 25%.......yeah, 175% humidity, that is pretty much what it feels like. I am sitting here with sweat dripping off my hands while I type.

I refuse to try to post pictures again. Blogger has won, I will never again post pictures. if you want pic's send $39.95 to Dans Pic's in St. Marc Haiti and be prepared to wait a long time. :)

very good news today. Stalley returned to school. she has quite a few scars and open scrapes and cuts but was in a good mood and seemed ok. One of the other little girls, Esperanza, came to me later after talking to Stalley and told me "you know Mr. Dan, I love Stalley." welcome back, Stalley!

ok, I have to go get towels and dry off the keyboard or I may short circuit the computer, so I may start posting at 3am.......or not.

Bondye benis ou.

update. Monday

Antonio came by: their home is gone. Antonio is Ronid's step dad. They slept last night in the church. The phones have started working, people are calling in, saying their homes were damaged, etc. Marco called; he, Rose and Faona slept outside last night. It will be a long day.